My First Love...

I am about to tell you the story of my first love. It is tender, emotional, and real. This will prove that I too have feelings and emotions

It all started when I was 12 years old. I was introduced to my first love. The Backstreet Boys. This means I have been in love for 15 years. Wow, top that. At first it was just an interest, then it turned into more. From there it very quickly turned into obsession. I own every album, went to every concert in Utah, have the biography of their lives, and until 4 months ago had a backstreet boys video. I gave the video to Kim as a gift to remember our years living together. I felt like it was a huge sacrifice and showed her how much her friendship means to me. She gave the tape to D.I., jerk. When I was 13 I wanted to find Backstreet Boys wallpaper however their was no such thing so instead I made my own. I completely covered my walls in posters cut from those teeny bopper magazines. It was super cool. I even hated, despised, and lothed NSYNC because some people thought they were superior to my boys. There was no real competition though, BBoys were simply better, no arguments about it. I knew all their names (and still do). Nick Carter, Howie Dorough, A.J. McClean, Kevin Richardson, and of course Brian Litrell. In the rebelious days of my life I said I was in love with A.J. but I think that was mostly to freak my parents out because of all his piercings and tattoos. I was really 100% dedicated and loyal to Brian.

Then things got rocky and they sometimes do. We grew apart. I grew up and I moved on. I forgot about the boys and started trying knew things. Sure I would listen to their cd's every now and again. For old times sakes. I even kept a folder of a few really great posters from our times together. Every 6 months I would sometimes google them to see any recent articles about them or news. I was just checking on them. I wanted to make sure they were still alive and doing okay. Even though I didn't completley forget them they were no longer a part of my life.

Then it happened. Three days ago I was just doing my thing on i-tunes when I saw it. Their new cd! I couldn't believe it. I couldnt' resist. I knew it was wrong and that I should stay away but I had no control. I had to at least be curtious to our past love and listen to the samples of their song. Well I listened to one song and then I immediatley downloaded the entire cd. I Listened to the whole thing twice through and started doing my research. I had to know all the knew details. There are now only 4 members of the group and I had to know why Kevin left. I needed to know if they were having a tour, who sang what parts in their songs, etc. I have been a mess ever since. I have to listen to the cd at least twice daily but I try for three. It kills me that I don't know all the words yet to the songs. I'm yet again obsessed. I am a 23 year old female that cannot get over her first music love. Is it wrong? Probably. Is it sad? Yes. Am I pathetic? Most definately. However nothing is gonna stop me now.

If you have seen the movie Music and Lyrics. I feel like all those old lady groupies that followed Hugh Grant's character around to Knottsberry Farms and Highschool reunions. I wouldn't be surprised if I am like that when I am 50+. Still stalking the BBoys. Googling them, checking tour dates, and singing all their songs in the shower. They are unreplacable and they will always be my number 1. I guess it is true that you never get over your first love.

Don't judge me.